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Crimson_Eyes
06-12-2008, 09:04 PM
Hello! Well anyway I starting this story... and I'm stuck. This is just the Intoduction and I was wondering how does it sound? Please, go easy on me.


....And that's all it took, one shoot to the head. And he was gone, eyes widen, but lungs breathless. Blood stained the kitchen walls and the pores of my skin. A shocking, yet pleasing scene. I hated that man, I hated him with a blazing passion. The thought of obliterating him burn through my brain every night as I sat in the silence of my room, and listened the sounds of the thrashings bounce off my lavender colored walls. I never thought I would do it, I never believe in such insane thoughts, yet it happen...Daddy go bye-bye. Say a pray for his soul. Pray it reaches its place, not to wonder on this Earth. And hope you'll find a blessing.

^_^' that's all I have. :( now I'm on writer's block.

HyuugaHinata
06-13-2008, 02:34 PM
It's ok. There are a few mistakes I noticed. Overall, it is good :).

caseclosedchild(narurakue
06-13-2008, 02:56 PM
AWESOME!i could help u with ideas!

Crimson
06-13-2008, 09:22 PM
It's ok. There are a few mistakes I noticed. Overall, it is good :).

Yes it was 'ok' as she said....And I noticed a few mistakes too...But not enough to deprive me of the meaning, and the story ^^....I liked it...Hope your writers block ends soon....