Chuck Norris Jokes!!

[Huschibaba]

if you have a good chuck norris joke please post it xD

i'll start:
chuck norris tears can heal cancer!
it's a shame he never cries...

[hmvv]

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

[Angel Slayer]

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norrised.

[hmvv]

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

[Nabuza]

A man once asked Chuck Norris if "Chuck" was short for "Charles". Chuck Norris just stared at the man till his head exploded.

[hmvv]

Chuck Norris, Vin Diesel and Arnold Schwarzenegger have all died and are in Heaven. Each of them hope to occupy the seat next to God. God asks Vin Diesel why he thinks he should have the seat and Vin replies, "I believe... I should have the seat because of the virtuosity in my toughness and pride." Arnie says, "I believe... that I should be the one sitting next to you because of all my achievements." God then turns to Chuck Norris, who replies with, "I believe... you are sitting in my seat."

[Nabuza]

Everytime you masterbate God kills a kitten, every time God masterbates Chuck Norris kills a lion.

[Huschibaba]

Chuck Norris has two brothers, they're called DEATH and PAINS

[Nabuza]

God said Let there be light Chuck Norris said Say please

[hmvv]

the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. the only thing fear has to fear is chuck norris.

[Huschibaba]

once a random guy said that a round house kick wouldn't be the quickest way to kill a human. after that he met chuck norris.
now we know that incident as the biggest mistake in human history

(sry for my bad english xD)

[Nabuza]

Jesus could walk on water, Chuck Norris could walk on Jesus

[Huschibaba]

chuck norris can burn the sun

[Ceji]

Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.:D
Chuck Norris can win Connect 4 in three moves.:D

[Ceji]

Under Chuck Norris' beard he does not have a chin. He has another fist.

[RasenganWarrior]

chuck norris doesnt kick people...

he uses his power to force the universe to make your head smash it self
he uses the kick to hide this

[Chidori]

Chuck Norris is lame and gay....And he doesnt deserve all this praise

[RasenganWarrior]

chuck norris has the power to kick people in the head
through all nine degrees of seperation

[majinsharingan]

Can cure cancer...BUT DOESNT!!

[RasenganWarrior]

is the leading cause of death and keeps cancer for the competition

[XxkyuubixX]

once chuck norris looked into a mirror and the mirror broke, not because chuck norris was ugly, but because even a mirror isnt stupid enough to get in between chuck norris and chuck norris.

chuck norris doesnt go hunting, cause that implies the probability of failure, chuck norris goes killing.

if at first you dont succeed, your not chuck norris.

lol

[Nabuza]

President Kennedy was not shot when he died. Chuck Norris jumped in the way and deflected the bullet with his beard. Kennedy was so amazed that his head exploded.

[RasenganWarrior]

myspace is not an internet sight it's just what chuck norris calls the universe

[Shishi Uchiha]

chuck norris doesnt pay for prostitutes, prostitutes pay for chuck norris